My views on depression, as with many other things, is very different than conventionally accepted thinking. These views come from a desire to REALLY HELP. Not to hurt anyone, but to really make a difference and not let it be something that is acceptable to go with the status quo any longer.
As we know, depression is an epidemic! With staggering numbers ACROSS ALL AGE GROUPS! And most notably and rising steadily and quickly...among our youth. Younger and younger are the ages affected with each passing year. There has to be something to be done. And of course there is. There are many things. The challenge is, are we ready to do them? Are we ready to challenge status quo and quid pro quo? Are we ready to look at depression differently?
My view on depression, as with many other things, is drastically different than conventionally accepted thinking. These views come from a desire to REALLY HELP. Not that conventionally accepted beliefs about depression don’t come from a desire to help, but with numbers rising DAILY, we CAN ONLY afford to look at it differently. Not to hurt anyone, blame anyone, point fingers, or put anyone down, but to really make a difference and not let it be something that is acceptable to go with the status quo any longer. What we’re currently doing isn’t working, and it’s time for an overhaul. What is CLEAR to me is that there needs to be LESS focus on what’s WRONG, and MORE focus on the individual greatnesses of each person. LESS about comparisons, statistics and the ability to see glimpses of everyone else’s lives everywhere we turn, and MORE on simplicity of self, self acceptance, love for who the self IS and MORE focus on how to serve it out into the world. WHY? Because you are here for a reason (even if you don’t currently see it). And I can help to do that.
Over the next few weeks, we’re going to be bringing attention to the symptoms of depression IN A POSITIVE WAY, not in an “I accept you, you have a disease” kind of way ( THAT is already happening, and is it possible it’s not really working?) This is NOT about accepting the disease or people that are suffering with it. It is about attending to the individual that wants it to be different. If you are that individual, read on….
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #1: Depression is not an “it”. It is not even a THING unless we make it such. ( It doesn’t mean you don’t “have it”, or we don’t accept or acknowledge if you do. This is learning to live DESPITE “it”. ) We have gotten caught up in the labeling and defining, the separation and identification of all things. I’m wondering if (especially in this case) this only furthers the separation and leads to one way being the “right way” and all others being the “wrong way”. We are in alignment with our life or we are not. We don’t have to focus on defining whether we ARE or we ARE NOT, life (and healing towards alignment) is an up and down process.
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #2: Stop claiming it. The second you label something as “my”, you’ve claimed it. It is now yours, a part of you. If it is not something you WANT in your life, truly something you DO NOT WANT, I certainly wouldn’t lay claim to it. Which leads me to…
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #3: Make sure you really DON’T want it. I know that sounds easy to say, but for real….Do you really, ARE you really, ready to make the changes that you internally know need to change in order for you to understand your own happiness? You’ll know if you are, because those that want to won’t be offended by looking at depression in a different way. They won’t feel like they have to “define” “their depression”. If you ARE offended by anything in this article, or this series, or these exercises, I would look at your self worth. I am not trying to offend ANYONE. I REALLY WANT TO HELP and I can’t do that if you aren’t open . If you feel like you need to defend “your “ “disease” I would ask yourself where you feel unworthy, unloved, unaccepted. (Do yourself a favor, just ask the questions)
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #4: Let’s find Greatness Grouping instead of idolizing a reason NOT to be our Greatness. Has it slipped our notice that just like any “group” a person tries to fit into, the “new” group (called “depression) has , unfortunately, and unadmittedly, become a hip new thing to “be”? It is another slot one who is trying to find themselves can fit into. And since we ALL don’t feel sometimes like we fit in, like things make sense, or that we’re good enough, it’s WAY TOO EASY to fall into the labeling of “Depression” (see Thought Overhaul #’s 1 and 2)
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #5 We cannot just acknowledge it. I am not trying to “put down” those suffering from depression. I am not trying to tell you it’s all in your mind. I am not telling you it doesn’t exist. Or to “suck it up”. What I am saying is that NOW THAT WE KNOW THESE THINGS, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT? What are those of us that SURROUND those currently suffering in struggle going to do , because it is REAL that often one cannot think clearly when in such a state. How can we as “The Surrounding Involved” support and mentor without enabling or removing the responsibility of action from those that are currently in the struggle? How can those in the struggle acknowledge how they feel, get support, without being talked to from a frame of reference and definition of “what depression is”, thus only encouraging the labeling of a “depressed” individual. In my humble opinion, we need to see it not as a PART of someone (at the same time as accepting the WHOLE person) (This is not who you are, even though it IS what you are currently experiencing) but to encourage the WHOLE of the PERSON to emerge, essentially to ask “Who are you, really?”. This in itself, can be a trigger of depression, because ONE OFTEN DOESN’T KNOW. But that’s what we need to work towards finding out.)
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #6: Depression is looked at almost as an identity trait, and this simply can not be if there is any hope in resurrection of the true self. Acceptance for what a person is going through in a “You can do this, how can I help?” way is very different than accepting someone for who they are. Depression IS NOT WHO YOU ARE. That’s like saying, “Oh, well that’s too bad , you got blonde hair”, or “You’re short”, or “You got depression. Bad luck of the draw, nothing you can do about it now.” You ARE despite depression. What else are you?
THOUGHT OVERHAUL #7: Acceptance Vs. Enabling. Being enabled to KEEP a label just because you once received it is NOT going to help you grow beyond it. I DO NOT believe depression is an inherent trait. It is NOT your innate beingness. It is okay for people to understand what you are currently going through IN ORDER TO help you grow through it. NOT as a reason for you to be LESS than you really are. “Understanding you have an illness” is NOT going to help those suffering from depression. TRUST ME AS ONE WHO’S BEEN THERE. I would be dead for listening to those ready to pander to me. Listen: these thoughts overhauls, exercises, or program are NOT RIGHT for everyone. But you will know if they are right for YOU.
Depression is NOT a Guru.
In the coming weeks, I’m going to give you more Thought Overhauls, foods to eat, lifestyles to alter, and help for those who really want it. I’m going to give you “facts” and Common Accepted Thoughts about depression. I’m going to give you challenges so you can understand YOURSELF better. I’m going to bring the focus to you for PROGRESSIVE FORWARD ACTION rather than bring focus to you because of “your disease”. I’m going to give assistance to the “Surrounding Involved’s”, those that are handcuffed to depression, and strategies for those that work in support of helping people honor, support, and help move through those that are currently struggling.
Depression is a struggle. It is not a Guru.
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